Sunday, June 14, 2015

So many people joke about having ADHD, but I have an official diagnosis now.  Here is a sample of two consecutive days my life.  A bit of background is required here.  As you may have noticed in my previous post, I applied to the Regents Alternative Pathway to Iowa Licensure program.  Much to my surprise, they accepted me.  Graciously.  Classes began June 5 and it is pretty intensely compact.  I was diligently working on Thursday because I promised myself I would not be THAT student.  You know, the one that always turns assignments in just in the nick of time.  The old me. 

On Friday I wrote the following email to my RAPIL cohort (that is what our group is called):
[I started off with a compliment about one of our classmates.  Not relevant here.]
Here is another little nugget for your enjoyment.  You may recall that yesterday I emailed you guys to ask about that CCC#1 review guide.  Well, in true Burkle fashion, I neglected to check your replies.  I spent a good number of hours writing responses to each one of those.  And there are a TON.  With two remaining, I checked back in to my email and saw a barrage of wonderful responses from you all that would have set me straight and saved me lots of time.  Last night I completed the ACTUAL assignment.  It was a full RAPIL day for me.
Having said that, I can tell you that I know the first section very, very thoroughly. 

As the day started on Friday, I was so looking forward to seeing my psychiatrist for follow-up.  I was very proud of myself two days ago when I received the reminder phone call.  “Ha!” I thought, “I am already on top of it.  It’s written on my calendar.”  I was going to get to talk all about my favorite topic…ME… and let him know how I probably need a slight increase in my dosage of ADD meds, particularly in light of my day on Thursday.  I spent all morning writing an absolutely fabulous linkedin profile summary about ME.  I even made myself laugh out loud. 

Next I went to a spin class with my daughter at noon.  On the way, I texted my son, “Where are you?”  After class I texted him again, “????”  He replied, “I’m at work.”  Oh, yeah.  He told me last night that he was working today.  I forgot. While at the gas station filling my daughter’s tank, I bought a couple of songs from iTunes that I heard on the radio and I checked my emails.  Oops.  Overdraft notice from my bank.  I bounced a check to my son’s basketball camp that I signed him up for AFTER the deadline.  Shit.  I stopped at the bank to transfer money and then emailed the camp director to let him know I bounced the check but that the money is in my account now.

Now I’m starving because I hadn’t eaten all day. Because I forgot.  But I am also thinking I need to pick up my kids from their dad’s house soon.  I called to tell them I would be there in twenty minutes.  I stopped at the Arby’s drive-thru (I hate fast food) and grabbed a sandwich.  While paying for my food, the cute guy taking my money was giving me the stare down and I could tell he thinks I’m attractive.  I am seriously questioning his judgment because I recently left the gym and I hadn’t showered in two days.  As I pulled away with my food, I saw him in my rearview mirror hanging out the drive-thru window watching me and waving.  No joke.  That gave me a little smile and I continued on my way.

I was headed to get the kids and I glanced at the clock in my car. 1:43.  My appointment with my doctor was scheduled for 1:30!!!!  I made a quick u-turn, called the kids to say I won’t come until later, and then called the doctor’s office to tell them I had inadvertently missed my appointment.  The receptionist told me if I can make it in four minutes, my doctor will still see me.  No way.  But I headed there, anyway, to reschedule and leave him the following note:

Dr. H************ (he has a very long name),
My failure to show up for my appointment today says it all.  I was so looking forward to speaking with you and I had it written on my calendar.  However, I got distracted and forgot. I clearly need an increased dose of my medication.  I apologize for the inconvenience.  I have rescheduled for July 29 (first available) [47 DAYS FROM NOW!!!] and I am on the cancellation list. 
Respectfully and apologetically,
Lisa Burkle

Now if all of that doesn’t make your head spin, I’m not sure what would.  And I can assure you that not one bit of that was embellished at all.

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